The Downside (nag) is the (nag) same for any nationality (nag) of wife(nag). (nag nag)

LOL, I wouldn't know, I haven't married any Taiwanese women lately! *rolling eyes* : P

My wife informs me that there is no downside. Just sunshine and skittles till death do us part. :-)

But honestly though, the upsides you mentioned sound legal while the downsides seem personal. From a purely technical standpoint, there doesn't seem to be any drawbacks to a non-Taiwanese and Taiwanese marriage.

That having been said, I think we all go into relationships with certain expectations. These expectations might be amplified with cross-cultural marriages, especially in the beginning, but once you get into the swing of things, the personal connection comes down to the synergy between the two of you.

I'll bet you haven't even tried...

Lack of self esteem I guess...

And pretty sure polygamy is illegal here.

The answers got me laughing. Thanks guys.

There are tonnes of hits (just to read), on this topic, but only six comments left behind. Are the rest of the folks worried, that their wives might sneak in behind their backs, and read their opinions/comments posted? C'mon guys....I support cross cultural marriages! They are more interesting for sharing ideas and daily living becomes more of an adventure.

I was talking to a fellow teacher, who has been here for a few years...his comment was "I know of ONLY ONE married couple (Taiwanese/Foreigner)" who is happy. I thought it was pretty funny to hear that. But, like anything, it's subjective.

Marriage does seem to bring out the worst in people sometimes. Have to be willing to compromise, sacrifice, and still not have it your way! haha. Yup. Marriage is not like Burger King and more like Taiwanese restaurants. You don't get it your way, you get it how you get it and you end up eating it and paying in the end for it anyway even if you didn't order it.

Mother in law, sister in law, brother in law, in fact her whole family( apart from her of course, she's fantastic aren't you darling. Yes ok I will erase this now. OK I'll go and apologise. Sorry darling love you. Yes I love your mum's cooking. No please don't hit me again. OOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWW

Butting in. So seriously, nobody's gonna ask a lady's opinion? The official question states "Taiwanese gal", of which I know nothing. But I will say this (and probably sound like an idealistic spazzobot), if two personalities come together and bring out the best in each other then so many problems can be overcome by simple communication.

Such as jumping over a fire in a ballgown with a six foot train in front of a bunch of people I just met. At least I knew about it beforehand.

Of course, it must get more exciting after kids, but I have faith.

We need more females here... It's starting to smell a bit like stale beer in this place.

Jazz and Alun's comments just echo what marriages are like in general and in the end, that's what you get. Dating is a bit odd wherever you are. It's easy to say it's a cross cultural thing. Yeah, you need to get past the fact that your significant other is eating with sticks while we've evolved to metal cutlery but all in all I think it comes down to how you make it work. 'You' as in plural you that is.

Sheet, Bugsy, your friend's comments don't sound too cheery but I'm guessing he doesn't know that many happy Taiwanese couples too.

Alun, your comment reminds me of the joke:
What's the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
Outlaws are wanted.

Ha, ha.

>Such as jumping over a fire in a ballgown with a six foot train in front of a bunch of people I just met. At least I knew about it beforehand.

Um, they still do that in Kazhazstan, do they, Emmy? :-)

LOL Yes, as a matter of fact, there are only two known places where they still do that: Kazhazstan and MY GARAGE. ; P

One night only, limited seating!

Can I video tape it?

Hi People

Interesting thread.

I think it all comes down to is how much and what kind of effort are you willing to put into your marraige?

From the Taiwanese whom I have talked to, Taiwanese take marraige for granted once they become married. Whereas North American couples will seek counselling to help their marriage. Also many Taiwanese find it not very important to read up on marriage and learn how to keep a marraige together.

I guess we have to remember that Taiwan is a 2nd world country as compared to North Anmerican standards. So we can't expect the same level of knowledge and education as well.

I knew one Taiwanese girl who was anxious to get married that her marraige lasted a whole six months. Now she is a single mom with a child to look after. Another girl I knew was so desperate to get married that she'd marry anyone as long as they had a job. It took her a whole six weeks to find someone. Go figure.....

McLovin (AKA Dr. Love)

Knowledge is power and....

With great power comes great responsibility.
(Ben Parker...from "Spiderman")

Jazz: You're too late! I already have it on DVD... you can borrow!  ; D

McLovin: Be careful of stereotyping all Taiwan's population (and North America's). I managed to find the opposite of what you described, and have plenty of friends back in the states with marital problems. I think anyplace on earth will have problems of some sort with relationships. It does seem traditional here, but not everyone's like that.

>I guess we have to remember that Taiwan is a 2nd world country as compared to North Anmerican standards. So we can't expect the same level of knowledge and education as well.

Uh, 2nd world?  Knowledge and education?  What's that gotta do with relationships?  Me thinks Dr. Love is extrapolating from a small sample pool. 

By the way, anyone else notice the cool new commenting features?  Here's some gratuitous symbols just so I can later claim to be the first to use them.

Don't know when I'm gonna use these or what they actually are for or or even how to pronounce ¤Þߺ§ø but I sure feel sooooo . 

Sorry McLovin, but I think you've got that wrong.

The Taiwanese count marriage for life. It is other countries that take marriage as taken for granted. As friends back in England say, marriage is nothing now, it doesn't work then you get divorced and get married again. Here it used to be very unusual to see a divorced couple as it is a big disgrace.

They don't go to counselling because they have the traditional counselling of family and friends and the old lady or man who knows everything.

I think other countries might want to go back to traditional values that are held here. i.e marriage is for life, support from family, neighbors watching out for each other,family businesses.

Usually when I see problems rising here it is because of a western influence. And of course now the western influence in education. Here we go, " My child is never wrong, positive attitude. only reward , don't punish, no homework, I only want my kid to have fun, no pressure." ARghhh I'm getting on my soap box again.

Damn people have got in first. Maybe Mr lovin is trolling for a wind up

Not really understanding at what you're getting at but people can only judge from personal experience.   Since most of my Taiwanese friends have well educated backgrounds they understand the value of education.

Rather than just basing things on a family's opinion, education is changing the way in which people think.

A marraige is based on many factors which interact with one another.  Family is only one of them.  If one married into a family where the family members are un-educated then most couselling is based on opinion and saving face for the family.

However, in an educated surrounding people seek the advice of those with knowledge rather than the opinions those in their immediate surroundings.

McLovin'

Education≠happy marriage.  Knowledge is not helpful in relationships.  Wisdom, empathy and respect trump book learning. 

I agree that folks usually look to their peers (based on education and economic status among others) for advice but PhD's giving advice about the heart are just as qualified as Pepe, the 1 one eyed tattooed elementary school dropout sailor down the street. 

Okay, now I'm being silly but you get the point.  There's no "thinking" through relationships.  You put in the effort, he/she puts in the effort and with luck and you'll be googly eyed wrinkle prunes celebrating your twilight years together. 

Wait a minit. I just thought of one correlation between marriage and education. 
Higher levels of education might make a potential partner feel that the educated person would be a better provider thus giving them some charisma points. 
Peers of the spouse of the educated person might also feel that the marriage is more worth working through and give advice that encourage patience, dedication and perseverance. 
But then again, the more education you seek, the later you marry.  And perhaps the later you marry, the less likely you are to divorce. 
McLovin', you did say that it does depend on the effort put into it.  Let's agree to disagree on the other points.  I think those are superfluous anyway, like that nasty 3rd nipple Jazz was showing us the last time we went to the waterpark.  Jeezus, bud, wear a t-shirt next time, willya. 

......nothing wrong with marrying later on in life..... is there?

McLovin (aka The Love Machine) replies to all "Who's your daddy?"  

.......hmmmm..... what's this third nipple thing?  (can you post a picture .... is this like one of the eighth wonders of the world..... we need something new to gossip about....)

         Can't someone just point me to a nice fishing hole away from civilization? 

             McLovin

I just got back from shrimping tonight.  Didn't catch that ma ny, but caught a buzz and grilled some delicious prawns...  You should give that a whirl...

McLoving, nothing's wrong with getting married late in life.  It finds you when it does.  Happens to the best of us.  :-)

Let's just consider this thread closed.  Thanks again for sharing, Jazz.  I just threw up a little in my mouth.    Now I've gotta disinfect my screen and bleach my eyes out.  Yikes!  Ha, ha. 

For me, as a female Taiwanese, marriage is serious for life. No joke, no trade.

Marriage isn't about nationalities, it's about the two who want to marry to each other.

Taiwan is not a second world country.

We have an ok education system, ok maybe it's not so good.

Education is another issue.

I don't think Taiwan has a second rate education system. 

There are a lot of pluses but of course there are some bad things too.  The worst thing about the education, in my humble opinion, is that the politicians are deciding policy and it keeps changing.  They outlaw "reference" books which teachers use to reinforce lessons.  Their goals are admirable but they keep changing making it tough to have any long term goals or training for the teacher or any clear guidelines for the parent or student.

The thread has shifted off a bit.  I think the emphasis of it is what are the pros and cons of marrying a Taiwanese while identifying some major potential cultural conflicts that may arise.    I

have been joking about marriage, but I don't have a Taiwanese wife so I should really keep my mouth shut.  I guess I enjoy joiking around too much.  I have had Taiwanese girlfriends before and like to joke around about that but the truth be told, those relationships were mostly superficial and landed within 6 months of departure. 

All cross cultural experiences are welcome here.

Jazz, I think what we are seeing from our married-to-Taiwanese comrades is that marriage is the same wherever or whomever you're tying the knot with.  Besides the pragmatic considerations, marriage is about the bond between two people.  The personalities of these two are more consequential to the success of a marriage than the cultural considerations. 

Cross cultural marriages probably have the same difficulties as cross economic class, cross educational status, cross racial divide, cross religion, cross post-poo wiping technique (scrunch or fold)...you get the point.  (Hey, I just got a great idea for a new poll!)

Ditto!

That's the truth, man. The expectaions, and the cultural differences. But like the Beatles said, all you need is love. anyway, here's to us, the married dudes. Cheers.

Somebody told me that there is a lot of 'paperwork' involved in marrying a Taiwanese.  Like, you gotta go to your embassy and get some forms notarised and request them to send some forms back to your home country and all that...and it took him like 4 to 5 months, all in. Any truth to that? What does the local Taiwan marriage bureau request from the foreigner?

That's correct, I had a slew of paperwork to do. The type and amount seems to be based on what country your passport is from. There was a loophole for mine though, so it didn't take 5 months. I ordered my background check from my hometown and had it notarized, instead of fingerprinting for the FBI, and it all went through properly within about a month.

Sure was exciting getting the right info about which papers I needed though. I really do hate my country sometimes.

INFORMATION FROM CANADIAN TRADE OFFICE - TAIPEI:

Marriage in Taiwan

Canadian citizens intending to marry in Taiwan will require an affidavit signed in front of a Canadian consular officer at the Canadian Trade Office in Taipei. Basically, this is a sworn declaration by the applicant that he/she is single or divorced and eligible for marriage in Taiwan. As the affidavit is a legal document, it must be attested in person by the Canadian citizen making the declaration, and cannot be done by fax or by mail.

We would require to see your Canadian passport and proof of Canadian citizenship (Canadian birth certificate or Canadian citizenship certificate), and in cases involving a previous marriage, a divorce document issued by a court order.

I HAVE NO IDEA HOW ACCURATE THE ABOVE INFORMATION IS.  This just sounds like a day's work for Canadians.

I tried to get married in Taiwan last year, and had to get a document from the UK to show that I was single. This cannot be done by mail, but requires you to go back to the UK and apply in person, then wait around 4 weeks to get the paper, during which you can't leave the UK.

So I got married in Hong Kong instead, which just requires a notarized document saying that you're single. A fair amount of paperwork, but you tick the boxes, pay the money and you can get married fast.

I tried to get married in Taiwan last year, and had to get a document from the UK to show that I was single. This cannot be done by mail, but requires you to go back to the UK and apply in person, then wait around 4 weeks to get the paper, during which you can't leave the UK.

So I got married in Hong Kong instead, which just requires a notarized document saying that you're single. A fair amount of paperwork, but you tick the boxes, pay the money and you can get married fast.

Wow. That is so stupid! I can't believe they don't have it set up where you can get the document at your embassy. What a bunch of c rap!

Actually Noob you could have got the document from Hong Kong or any other British Embassy. I got mine from Hong and it only took the queue to get it.

Inre. alunarnold.
Not doubting, just expressing disbelief at the runaround I got in my inquiries, but you mean you just went to Hong Kong, filled in a form, lined up and got the document - no contact with the UK on your part? Damn

OK...to clarify an earlier post. What you need to get married is a Certificate of No Impediment from the UK, to show you are single. Here some cut / paste from the UK FCO site:
START
The British partner is required to have an original and a photocopy of their passport and also documentation proving that they are single, a “Certificate of No Impediment” (CNI). This documentation must have been legalised by the Foreign and Commonwealth Office, and then certified by a Taiwanese Representative Office, for example the Taipei Representative Office (TRO) in London, and the Bureau of Consular Affairs in Taiwan.

The Taiwanese authorities will NOT accept a CNI issued outside the UK as proof of marital status. CNI can only be issued after an individual has fulfilled a residence requirement (normally two weeks) and the notice of the marriage has been displayed on the notice board in the district of residence in the UK.

If you are not normally resident in the UK, a CNI can be produced from the nearest local registry office to where you last lived in the UK. This will require you to fly back to the UK and stay there for approximately 4 weeks until the CNI is issued.
END QUOTE

However, in Hong Kong a CNI is not required.

I'm curious, alunarnold, did the document yu lined up to get in Hong Kong let you get married in Taiwan, or did you marry in HK?

Dang, that's tough. For the American version, I had to go to the AIT in Kaohsiung. The rep there asked me if I was married. I said nope. He signed the document for me.

Hi Noob, like everything here, and as I have found out in many places, there are always ways around the rules.. After asking the BTCO in Taipei they confirmed the same, that I had to go back to England. I couldn't believe this so I phoned the British Embassy in Hong Kong. They informed me that they could do it there. I went with pohotocopies of my passport, and the same as Robert I confirmed I was single. They gave me an official looking letter that I signed. I then took it to the Taiwan office in Hong kong and they authenticated it there and then.

Came back got married.

This was about 8 years ago so it might be different now, but as far as I can remeber the quote you have given sounds about the same.

I think if you look at the rules for Americans they have to go back to America as well but they have found a way around it.

Alun

The deal for me (although not in Taiwan) was a trip to the US embassy, a form to fill out, and then the form was notarized. It really was a waste of time as far as I am concerned. Basically it is a promise to them that you are single and whatever the money is to do it. Pure bureaucracy, and without it you don't get married legally...

Wanted to marry a sweet girl from Chaiyi but I live in Tokyo and she won't leave her friends or family...

If you marry her, congrats to you and be happy always...

Chris in Tokyo....

Hi, I read a few comments and some got my gutts cracking. I'm an ABC and did you know that Taiwanese people talk about things like this on their own websites, except the topic is "advantages of marrying an American" (of which most reasons tail around residency and the green card) so just in case there are Americans around, if you do marry a Taiwanese, you would have to convince her your reasons for giving up the American citizenship and living in Taiwan coz chances are she is planning on moving to America.

Thanks for sharing about that. Any info you can find regarding what Taiwanese people write about foreigners is welcome here, even if it seems in poor taste. It is interesting to see what the "other side" thinks.

I wasn't surprised to read Noob's comments.  Rather, I expected that to be happening. 

If I marry to an American or a foreigner,
I'd rather he stays in Taiwan for me.

A single taiwanese female here,
anyone wants to marry me? lol

photo? ;)